John Cusack has always been my celebrity crush. Ever since I saw him in Say Anything when I was a teenager, I knew I wanted to fall in love with someone exactly like him. Obviously, it was his character that made him such a heartthrob, BUT, I watched Must Love Dogs recently for the first time, and I swear it’s like he is THE SAME PERSON. His easy-going nature, adorable awkwardness, gentlemanly kindness, and awesome sense of humor when he plays Lloyd Dobler and Jake… Swoon. And let’s not forget his character, Jonathan Trager, in Serendipity. Again, SAME PERSON.
How does he do it? Is this really what he is like?! A girl can dream, I suppose. The point of this post is not to go on and on about John Cusack… It’s to mention that there is something to be said about expectations.
I think about this sometimes. Have I always had some sort of expectation when it comes to anything in life in general? I really am not so sure. I have hoped, sure. I have hoped for things to be a certain way, or go a certain way. But did I really expect them to? I don’t think so. But, again, that is the purpose of this post. I definitely have expectations now. Higher ones. Once upon a time, I expected nothing. What happened, happened. Does that make sense? I am asking myself this question more than I am of you, sweet reader. Hopes and expectations are clearly different in nature. When one hopes, their hearts nearly burst with rainbow-y, fantastic, romantic, fall-to-your-knees something. They get wrapped up. When one expects something, it is more logical in approach. Their brains evaluate all things sensible, and they go from there. Hope and Expectation are the equivalent to Dreamer and Idealistic. I have always been a romantic- a dreamer. A believer of all things Nicholas Sparks story line. My curiosity, now, is… Can one be both? Which is realistic? Will I find my Lloyd-Jake-Jonathan? Or will I be practical and be with someone who can meet realistic expectations? I do not know the answer to this yet. So stick around to find out? If you want to, I mean. Shit, I may end up being a born-again spinster with a bunch of cats and an RV that I drive everywhere/live in. Maybe embarrass my kids at college by dropping by to visit, while wearing a ridiculously floppy hat. Perhaps I will drink Earl Grey tea and ungodly amounts of coffee.
Or, I could meet my Lloyd-Jake-Jonathan and be completely comfortable in my own skin for the rest of my life… and never have to question whether I am loved by the one I love with my whole heart… ever again.